Wednesday, March 19, 2008
The Geek is strong with this one...
"You be Luke Skylocker. No, no, you be Dark Vader." Said the tiny Jedi with the crystal blue eyes and golden locks.
Two lightsabers ignited in the darkened chamber, each issuing forth a metallic swoosh, and pulsing with a foreboding hum. The two warriors stood, staring through one another with age-old animus. Their bodies remained as still as the night for a split-second, tensed, and then unleashed their fury. The sabers clashed - the sounds of their conflict echoing through the room, as blue light strobed across the walls.
The tiny Jedi parried her massive assailant's blow, and struck.
At this point, I was given a solid whack to the shin by a plastic lightsaber, and stood hopping on one leg - much to the amusement of my tiny, unspeakably cute foe.
"I won! Now, you chase me!"
In a development I would never have seen coming, The Girl has turned into a full-fledged, old-school Star Wars nerd. Original Trilogy, baby. Sure, sure, she's actually seen a total of about 40% of the three movies combined, because, what can I say? I edit pretty heavily. She's pretty iffy on the specifics of this particular nerdvironment, but still...she's got her lightsaber, I've got mine, and she can tell you all about the "Milliken Falyon", and "that man who's Hansolo's friend" (Mando Crlrssshnian).
I swell with a mix of pride and dumbfoundedness at my good fortune. My longsuffering bride shrinks into the corner, wondering what she could possibly have done to deserve this, and certain that things will only get worse when our ranks grow by one - a process that edges ever closer to completion.
Sure, The Wife is mortified, and would - I'm certain - love to run me through with my really really cool Force FX lightsaber (an object of nerdlust if ever there was one), but I must offer her a warning in response:
If you strike me down, I shall become more powerful than you could possibly imagine. Oh, yeah...she'll also have a hacked-off Junior Jedi to deal with, and we all know how petulent they can be, what with their trips to Tosche Station to pick up some power converters, their certainty that Biggs was right, and they'll never get out of here, and their general Hayden Christensenism.
If she ever learns that whole "Force neck pinch"-thing, bedtime's gonna get interesting...